Friday, November 5, 2010

Day Twenty Two. Part Two.

As soon as I got home I threw the car keys on the kitchen counter and rushed over to the computer to check the bus schedule for the remainder of the day. There was a bus leaving for New Jersey at 10:00am and then another one leaving at 2:00pm. I thought the 10:00am bus might be cutting it close so I decided that I was going to aim for the later one.

I had some key things to think about before I went all in on this crazy idea. One of those things was how was I going to tell my parents? Call them when I knew their phones would be off for the flight and leave them a message? Leave a note explaining where I was and that I'd call them later? Yeah, that sounded like a good plan. I'd write a note and put it on the counter and they'd find it. They might be a little worried at first but I'd call when I got to one of the stops and let them know that everything was ok.

The second problem I had was that I couldn't drive myself to the bus station and leave the car there. I had to get a ride. Finding a friend to give you a ride 10-15 minutes away on a Sunday afternoon is a little bit trickier than it sounds. Finally I talked to my friend Mike, who said that he would be able to give me a ride at around 12:45. That was pretty early considering the bus wasn't scheduled to come until 2:00pm but if that was all I could manage, I'd take it. I called Sam and told him the plan. My bus would get into New Jersey at around 8:30-9:00pm and he said that he'd be there to pick me up.

After I got everything situated, I fell asleep on the couch for about an hour. When I woke up I frantically was trying to find some luggage that my parents and my sisters didn't take with them to Florida. I found a carry-on size bag and a book bag. I filled them with some clothes but the trouble was that I didn't know how long I was going to be in New Jersey. Sam and I didn't discuss that far into our genius plan of being together. I packed enough for a week or so. I felt that was sufficient enough.

Before I knew it, Mike was honking his horn outside my house, and OF COURSE he was 25 minutes early. Blahhh! I didn't have time to blow dry my hair so I threw my hair up and threw my bags into the backseat of his car. I don't remember Mike asking me where I was going or why. I was glad that he didn't. I didn't want him to think I was crazy and I didn't want to get into explaining the amazing week that I just had. Before getting out of the car at the bus station, I think I thanked Mike a thousand times, along with calling him a life-saver.

I purchased my ticket and still had a lot of time until the bus came. I found a bench and posted up there. I set my bags up as a foot rest and turned on my iPod and chilled. Was I really about to do this?

It was getting closer to 2:00 and I gave Sam a call from the pay phone and told him that I was getting ready to leave and that I'd call him from the next stop that we make.

This was it. My leap of faith.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Day Twenty Two. Part One.

Sunday, May 10th, 2009

My alarm went off at 3:45am. When I said that Sam's bus was coming early Sunday morning, I wasn't kidding. His bus was scheduled to leave at 5:10am. When the alarm went off I felt my heart in my throat. I didn't know what was going to happen or if I was ever going to see Sam again. 

Sam got up and went into the shower and I sat on the couch in the bedroom just staring at his packed luggage, half contemplating if I could fit inside of it - haha! But all jokes aside, I felt as if I didn't step up right now, I'd lose something really great. It was my turn to take a leap of faith and do something. I had to find a way to New Jersey. I knew that I couldn't go on the same bus with Sam though. I wasn't ready. While I was sitting there thinking, I wrote Sam a very short note that I snuck into the back pocket of his jeans.

Sam got out of the shower and I told him that I was going to find a way to New Jersey. I wasn't sure what I was going to do but I was going to do it. He told me that he needed me with him back home and that he couldn't wait for his family to meet me because he talked about me so much. That made me nervous but I wasn't letting it stop me. 

Sam was ready to go so we loaded his bags in the car and started on our way to the bus terminal at the mall. The whole ride I was choking back tears. I didn't want him to see me cry like a baby and I wanted him to be confident that I was going to find a way to get to him as soon as possible. I wanted him to be confident because I wasn't sure how confident I was. I didn't know how I was going to tell my parents that I was going to New Jersey to spend some time with some guy that I met online and was in love with. 

Luckily, Sam's bus was late and I got to spend more time with him. We sat in the dark, empty mall parking lot, just looking and kissing each other. I didn't want to let myself think that this would be the last time. When the bus started pulling up, I started crying. I couldn't help it or hold it back. Sam's eyes were tearing up and I knew that this was love. We couldn't be without each other anymore. 

He gave his bags to the driver to tuck under the bus. He took my face into his hands, wiped away my tears and looked straight into my eyes and said, "I'll see you later right?" I nodded my head and kissed him and didn't want to pull away. I watched him climb onto the bus and find his seat. And I stood there and watched the bus pull away and disappear behind the trees across the parking lot. I couldn't spend even a night away from him. I had to move fast, and preferably before my parents got home from their vacation. 

The sun started coming up on my way home and I knew that I only had 7 hours and counting to figure out my options.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Day Sixteen, Seventeen, ect.

Sam and I had the most amazing time while he was in Pittsburgh. I took him around town and showed him Heinz Field and we went to the Carnegie Science Center one day. It was kind of weird for me because I'd lived in Pittsburgh since I was young and I know the place like the back of my hand, but when I was on my adventures with Sam, it felt like I was discovering everything all over again.

The bus tickets that Sam had purchased were for Friday, May 1st until Friday, May 8th. My parents weren't coming home until Sunday and I couldn't imagine spending time alone after he was gone. We decided on Friday to go and get his ticket exchanged so that he left early on Sunday morning. I'd never really been very spontaneous on  my own but with him it felt like it was just the right thing to do.

We spent our final two days having fun, but I couldn't help but feel the gigantic elephant in the room with the two of us. All I was thinking is, "what are we going to do after Sunday? Will I ever see him again?" I knew that what we had was too good for just the week and two days that we spent together. It needed to be longer. Something like, forever. I waited until Saturday night to ask. We were laying in bed watching basketball and I had my head on his chest. I grabbed his hand and asked, "so when are we going to see each other again?" He lifted my head off his chest and made my eyes meet his. He said, "we're going to find a way to make this work. I can't be without you." He can't be without me? I don't think I'll ever be able to sleep again unless he's next to me. I didn't say that of course, but I wanted to scream it. I had no idea what we were going to do. My parents had no idea about him. I told a few of my friends about him but they all thought I was crazy.

Out of nowhere he says, "come with me." I was shocked, excited, and then worried. How was I going to come with him? How long would I be there? How would I know what to pack? I had no idea. But I thought about it all night, until I fell asleep.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Day Fifteen.

( I apologize sincerely for the delay in posting!!! )

Once we woke up on the second day we stayed in bed for awhile. One thing I forgot to mention to Sam before we went to bed is that Bella would probably be joining us throughout the night. She liked to get inbetween people and get under the covers and sleep. Needless to say, Sam woke up by Bella licking his face instead of me licking it :-(

We finally got up and out of bed around 10:30. We both showered and got dressed and went downstairs. I looked around for something to make for breakfast but all I came up with was cereal which I didn't think he'd like to eat. I told him I was going to run out to the store really fast. In all of the excitement the day before I forgot to go and get groceries. All he did was laugh at how flustered I was. He told me to chill out and pulled out left over pizza and heated it up in the oven. It's pathetic, but I was in awe. I couldn't stop smiling. Heating up left over pizza is what I would have done if I were at the house by myself.

I loved that he didn't make a big deal about breakfast. He was very laidback and it was amazing. I promised that I was going to the store today and we wouldn't need to eat left overs for breakfast again. He didn't seem to mind the pizza at all though. Sam also told me that he wanted to go grocery shopping with me.

We get to the grocery store together and walked around looking for stuff that we could make to eat. He got pancake mix and chocolate chips and promised to make me chocolate chip pancakes because he knows that I love them! We ended up getting the ingredients to make tacos, and some chicken and fries. Just regular food that's not hard to make.

We got home and just hung out and played outside. It was so nice just to be around him that I couldn't believe everything that I was experiencing was real. I had never experienced anything like this before.

Eventhough it was a Saturday night, we decided to hang out in the house, drink some beers, mess around, and watch the NBA play-off games.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Day Fourteen. Part Four.

The drive home would usually take about 10-15 minutes but it felt a lot longer this time, and I felt myself driving slower than normal. I felt like if I drove slow the moment would last forever. As if when we got home Sam would just disappear and I'd wake up from a crazy night sleep and the greatest dream ever!

I pulled into my driveway, turned off the car, and took a deep breath. I looked over in the passenger seat, half expecting to see no one, but that wasn't the case. I saw Sam, smiling at me. I leaned over and kissed him before getting out of the car.

As we walked into the house Bella started going crazy. She eventually greeted Sam the same way she greets everyone, by peeing at their feet. LOL! Turns out Bella was just as excited as I was. I gave Sam a little tour of the first floor of the house and we just couldn't stop starring at each other and kissing. Sam wanted to take a shower because he was convinced he stunk from being cramped on the bus all day. I begged to differ. He smelled just as I imagined he would. Wonderful!

We dragged his huge bag up the steps and dropped it on the floor in the bedroom. Before he went into the shower he pushed me down on the bed and we had an intense make out session for about 5 minutes. While he was in the shower I got changed into something "a little more comfortable." It was pretty nerve wracking waiting for him to get out of the shower. When he did finally come out he looked so sexy! He had no shirt on and was still kind of wet from not drying off completely.

He leaned over top of me while I was laying in bed and kissed me everywhere. Then we switched and it was my turn to do the kissing. And since this is a PG blog, all I need to do is say that we made love, and it was incredible. I lost all awareness and perception of everything around me. Everything expect Sam. It was like God was finally allowing me to be happy.

After getting to know each other a little bit better, we went downstairs and made some pizza and had a few beers. We went to bed at around 11:30 pm, only to wake up at 2 am and make love again :)

I couldn't even fathom what the next day would be like but I couldn't wait!

Friday, July 9, 2010

Day Fourteen. Part Three.

Sam called back to tell me that when they filled the bus up with gas someone forgot to put the gas cap back on. So the bus was leaking gasoline. They said that they were just sitting outside of the bus waiting for someone to help with the gas cap. I told him to take another picture, and he did.

I was happy to see proof that he wasn't lying, but I was mad as hell at this minor setback. I wanted him to be here already!!! He called back 10 minutes later and said that everything was all good and they were back on the road again. He was about 3 hours away so I thought I would start to shower and stuff. I needed at least an hour to figure out what kind of outfit I was going to wear. I wanted to look casual, comfortable, and cute.

After I got done showering, doing my makeup and hair, and the most important thing, shaving my legs, I called Sam. He said that he just started seeing signs for Pittsburgh and he thinks that he's about an hour and a half away. I was freaking out! I had to hurry up and do some last minute things around the house and find something to wear.

Once I was done I left for the bus station, which just so happened to be at the mall. I didn't have a cell phone at the time so I brought some quarters so that I could call him from the pay phone to see where he was. The whole way to the mall I was trying to keep my cool. At every red light I was checking my hair and makeup in the rear view mirror. I was shaking a little bit. It wasn't only my body that was shaking, my heart was fluttering also. I was about to see the love of my life!

I got to the mall and pulled into a spot in the parking lot where the buses come in. I looked around and didn't see any buses coming so I got out and went inside to use the pay phone. When I spoke to Sam he told me that he got off the turnpike and that he saw a lot of car dealerships. He had to be on the same street as the mall! I told him I'd be out front when he got there. I hung up the phone and went back to the car to sit and wait for the bus. I don't think I even checked my hair and makeup one last time. I was just so focused on what I was going to do when I saw him. I thought about just running up to him and hugging him. I didn't know if a kiss would be appropriate.

I look to my right and I saw a bus pulling up. I think everything went into slow motion after that. I watched the bus pull across the parking lot and once it passed in front of me I looked down at myself, checked my outfit, and tried to pull myself together. I opened up my door and got out of the car. I saw people start to get off the bus but I didn't see Sam. I tried to look through the front windshield of the bus to see when he descended the steps and exited the bus but the window was tinted very dark. I looked both ways while I crossed the street to the curb where the exhausted passengers were gathering their belongings. I look back at the crowd and I see Sam. He had his hands in the air, trying to get my attention.

OMG! He looked so good. I went running into the crowd and as soon as I grabbed his arm and pulled myself close to him, my lips met his. All of a sudden my world, my heart, and my life were all colliding and bursting into the sky and shattering into bright colors and loud blasts. Some people would call it fireworks, but it was way more than that! When we finally released our lips, he pulled his head back, but still had his hand placed behind my ear, and he said, "I love you."

We kissed again gently before I helped with his bags and made our way to the car. I was carrying his laptop bag and walking a few feet in front of him. I was hoping that I wouldn't like trip and fall or something. I turned back and looked at him as I walked and caught him glancing at my butt. He knew I caught him and we both laughed. We got back to the car and I popped the trunk and put all the bags in.

We sat in the car and kissed again for a minute and then started on the way home. The whole time I felt him starring at me and then I felt his hand on the top of my thigh. I was so nervous but it felt so good! I couldn't believe that Sam was sitting right next to me!

I couldn't imagine the evening getting any better. But it did...

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Day Fourteen. Part Two.

When Sam called me I was nervous to answer. I was scared of what he might say. A "sorry, something happened" or a "Katie I'm sorry, I missed the bus" would have KILLED me. But despite my fears, I answered and was met by a cheerful, "BABY!" He was at the Newark bus station and he was just waiting to board his bus. I was excited but I didn't know if I should have been. I was still a little worried that maybe he was lying. I told him that I was going to get up and start cleaning and I told him to take a picture once he was on the bus and send it to me.

I waited to start cleaning till my parents left. If they saw me cleaning the house they would have been very suspicious of house parties or something. As soon as I got off the phone with Sam I went down to the basement and started there. I figured I'd work my way up through the house. I had the entire house to clean! My family left it in disarray while packing and getting ready for their vacation. I was hoping that my family's vacation in Florida wouldn't be a nightmare for me back home. I just really needed Sam to come and see me today.

Once I was done with the basement I went over to the computer and checked my e-mail. Believe it or not, I had a picture from Sam. I opened it and sure enough, he was on the bus. I jumped up and down. I think I might have screamed also, because Bella came running into the room and barked at me. This was it. He was really on his way. I was finally, after a year of talking on the phone, I was going to finally meet Sam.

I went crazy. I put my iPod on and I cleaned the house frantically. I wanted everything to be perfect. His bus should be coming in at 7:45-8:00 so I thought I'd clean until around 4 or 5 and then take a shower. I'd shave my legs last, so they'd be EXTRA smooth. I didn't want to be some hairy beast. Then I started thinking about what we'd do. I never thought this far ahead because I thought this day would never come. Should I kiss him as soon as I see him?  I mean, we can't just like shake hands or something, that would be weird. Were we going to make love tonight? Did I gain weight? I don't want to look like a beached whale! I was getting nervous to the point where I thought I might throw up.

At around 2:00 pm I got a call from Sam. There was something wrong he said. Something with the bus. They had to pull over at a rest stop and wait for help.

Was this another excuse? Could this seriously be happening?

I couldn't believe it. I stopped cleaning and told him to call me back once he found out what was going on. I sat on the couch with the t.v. on for about 20 minutes until the phone rang again. I prayed that it was good news....

(more to come later tonight...)

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Day Fourteen. Part One.

Friday, May 1st, 2009

My dad woke up at around 4:00 am. He always liked to be the first one up. I remember as a little girl I use to not leave my bedroom until my dad woke up and went downstairs to make coffee. I was convinced that the reason he went down first was to make sure no monsters or bad guys were in the house. LOL

At around 4:30 am my mom and my two younger sisters, Rachel and Nicole, woke up. Rachel and Nicole were sooo excited to be riding on an  airplane. I guess I could relate because the first couple times I rode on one, I was excited too. The bags were already in the car and they just showered and hit the road. I was at the bottom of the steps with Bella, our miniture daschund, who I grabbed out of bed to say good bye to my family. We sat there while everyone was running around making sure they had everything, and I heard my mom say, more than once, "I know I'm forgetting something, I can just tell."

Finally we all kissed and hugged and I wished them a safe trip and the door shut behind them and I was still sitting on the steps. I realized that the whole time the house had been frantic and the whole time people were running passed me to get their last minute items, all I was thinking about was Sam.

As excited as I was, it was really early for me. So I headed back to bed only to be woken up by a phone call at 8:30 am from Sam...

I was nervous. Was he going to tell me that he was on his way or was he going to let me down again?

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Day Thirteen.

I woke up the next day, still upset, obviously. My mom sits down and has a cup of coffee with me and randomly asks me, "hey do you want to go to Florida with us on May 1st?" I didn't know if this was a planned trip or a spur of the moment idea. But I gotta tell you, Florida is not my favorite place in the world. I hate heat and I'm not a person that enjoys laying out in the sun. I'm not much of a beach person either. And I had just got done doing all of the traveling from PA to CA and back.  I told her I'd think about it. After all this drama with Sam, I thought I might need a vacation.

I stopped talking to Sam for a day and then resumed speaking to him briefly the day after that. I let him know that my family was going to Florida but I wasn't too sold on the idea yet. A week by myself in Pittsburgh might be really nice. Have some friends over, relax, get my life back together, look for a job. That was the plan at least.


I decided to just bring up the idea of Sam coming to spend the week with me. We didn't really make plans right away like we had previously done. I just kind of put the bug in his ear and let it go from there. I thought it would be kinda cool to bring it up, with no pressure. If he came, it would be great and fantastic and I know we'd have a good time. If he didn't come, it was whatever, I was use to it. And that week would be the week that I started to put things into perspective and if Sam wasn't in my headlights, he'd be in my rear view mirror. I was prepared to move forward. He had 2 weeks to decide and since he got "lost" everytime he tried to come before, I suggested taking a bus. And he actually didn't mind that idea.

As the count down started to May 1st, things started to work out nicely. My parents didn't mind that I wasn't going to Florida and they understood that I was tired of traveling and air planes and airports. And Sam was able to get time off work. I have to admit that the no pressure planning was the best technique that I tried.

Thursday, April 30th... 10:30pm

My parents were leaving at 5 am the next morning for the airport. Sam's bus was leaving NJ at 9:00am and he'd be arriving at around 7:30pm.
I couldn't sleep. I was far too excited and anxious and terrified.

May 1st could possibly change my life forever. I guess I'd just have to wake up and see what happened. I prayed so hard that night. I prayed that Sam would finally come and see me.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Day Twelve.

The day had come. The day that Sam said he'd be coming to see me. I didn't know whether to get up and start doing my hair or just stay in bed all day. He said he was on his way but what makes this time any more significant than last time? He kept reassuring me that he was on his way but I wasn't so sure.

Either way, I couldn't stop myself from getting excited. I didn't make any plans that night, just incase. I even let my parents know that I might be having a friend over. They had no idea how in love I was and I wanted to burst out and tell them, but I couldn't.

And when 10:30pm came around, I'm glad I didn't share anything with my parents. I would have been so embarrassed because Sam didn't come... AGAIN! How much more could I take? How much more would he put me through until he felt like it was really time to come see me? I felt like an idiot that couldn't stop hurting myself. Even though it was Sam that was hurting me, I was allowing him to hurt me every time.

When is it my turn to be happy?